My heart is heavy today and when heaviness sets in on me it usually turns to words on a blog.

Just to lighten it up a little, I can hear the priest from Princess Bride, "Mawwiage, Mawwiage is what

Bwings us togevah today"

Put on the grown up undies cuz it's about to get REAL!

Someone asked me a long time ago, what makes your marriage work so well?

I had no idea what to tell her.

But I think I do now. Commitment and WORK!!! It ain't the Glam answer that people want but it's

the truth!

I never really understood how old people could say they loved their spouse more now than when they

first got married. But now I get it. I totally understand. I guess that makes me old!

Long after the butterflies in your stomach migrate south. There has to be more.

There is this amazing thing about commitment, it makes a marriage safe, trust filled, uninhibited,

and thus, long lasting.

The love I feel is deeper today than it was when we first got married because life has happened.

Developing deeper and more intimate love than we could have ever hoped for as love struck

teenagers a long long time ago. You see, as you go through the mountain tops and the valley's of life,

and your partner is walking with you, You develop trust. Trust that they will be there in the good

times and bad, for rich or for poor, in sickness and health,

Because they have! Its not just something cute you say in a marriage ceremony to make it legal.

IT'S REAL!

You actually have to live it out. And when you do, you come out on the other side of it, a better and

stronger couple because you have created another link in a chain that cannot be easily broken!

Every fun, difficult, wonderful and awful thing that you go through with your spouse and hang in

there for, creates a link.

A link to love that isn't a feeling and isn't a ball and chain but a perfectly designed beautiful chain

just for you! That links your two hearts together. Sounds corny doesn't it? Yep, but I know way to

many people that look at the bad times as an escape route, and the times when life is easy and going

along great, finances are in order and the kids are moving out and the house is perfect. People forget

how they got there. Thus, cutting the links. This is when it's also easy to lose your commitment.

I can honestly say that it has not been easy. We have had times where we look across the table from

each other and wonder what we did.  But our resolve is greater that our trials so we never are allowed

stay there!!

People think marriage isn't work. But I am here to tell you it is a full-time mandatory overtime on

weekends kind of work. Not to be taken lightly but to be taken seriously.

This is real life: You will get mad, you will get frustrated, you will not always get your way, you will

not always have what you want.

But your commitment to your marriage is worth giving up your way, anger, frustration, and wants.

Laugh at crazy things that happen, date often, and for heavens sake just  BE NICE (something so

simple but often forgotten in marriage)

COMMITMENT IS HARD WORK!

But the reward is a marriage filled with love, trust, intimacy, and a life of joy. But its all your choice

men and women, it's all your choice.

Choose well.

My dear new friend

I have not Blogged in quite a while however I have been quite active on Facebook. However, this post required a little more thought and time than a Facebook post so here I am.

I met a man about 2 years ago during my Operation Christmas Child work season. I would pass though the Starbucks in Eagan to get my coffee before heading to the warehouse. From the smell of Coffee to Cardboard!! YUM!

One day an older gentleman approached me while I was in the long line for coffee, apparently I am not the only one that doesn't brew at home, and on this day as it turned out God had a reason for that long line.
As the man who approached me would become my dear friend Bill.

He noticed my Operation Christmas Child T-shirt and asked me what it was all about. So a half hour later he knew pretty much more than he ever wanted to. I had passed my passion for OCC on to this poor old man.
Well, he loved it, and every day I would come to get my coffee he was there waiting to see me wanting to hear more stories.

After the season ended I didn't get up to the Eagan Starbucks anymore. A year went by and I never saw Bill.

Then one day I was leaving for Bible study early on a Tuesday morning and stopped by for a coffee. There he was. My 83 year old friend.
I said hi and remembered who I was immediately. We have been having coffee every Tuesday (sometimes Wednesday) morning now for almost a year!

We talk about everything from food to health and we laugh like school kids. He is 37 years older than me but we are amazing friends.
He is a wise well traveled man and never utters a negative tone! He is exactly like my husband just 36 years older!
I am not kidding! These two are so much alike I feel like I am speaking to the Kevin of the future!!

Last week he told me about his families tradition that dates back to the late 1800's. They all gather together in October to make their own Apple Butter.
His grandfather started it and the tradition has continued all these years!
Needless to say I was captivated! It was Pinterest before Pinterest was cool!
The family gathers together at his son's house and they have a copper kettle and an oak paddle to stir. They all help peel and cut the apples as well as stirring the 200 pounds of apples until they are cooked down. Nearly 10 hours! Each person takes their time to stir.
It is a timeless tradition in his family.
Captivated by this tradition doesn't begin to describe how I was feeling when he told me this! I love it! i wanted to run out and buy a copper kettle!! (where does one get a copper kettle)

So this morning I met him for our coffee date and he said he had a surprise for me. He pulls out a jar of his homemade Apple Butter!
I was elated! I couldn't thank him enough.

He is the most wonderful man I have ever known, aside from my dad and my sweetheart Kevin.
But what a gift God has given me in my 83 year old friend Bill.

The Power Of Love!

My little buddy Cole is going to be 1 year old and I can hardly believe it. Our first grandson!
I have been there with him growing every step of the way and I wouldn't trade a thing.

So far my husband is Papa and I am Nana. I like it! A LOT!

Sometimes I just sit back and watch my husband play with Cole and I think, my life can't get any better! It makes me think how great God really is.

Because of how different this story could have been.

I do not share my story with very many people for many reasons. Not the least of which is I do not want to make what we did and went through look like a good path for young people to take. But today I need to tell it. To show God's great love for us.

When Kevin and I had been dating for quite a while  we got engaged. Soon after that we entered a path we were not supposed to be on. We soon found out that I was pregnant.
I was angry! Mostly with myself for compromising my beliefs I had held on to so deeply. But, I decided to take it out on Kevin.
 I was going through a lot emotionally and for 9 months I did not want to have anything to do with Kevin. We did not see each other and he was not at the birth of our first child. (this was my choice not his!)
He came to see him a couple times but I was still very angry so there was really no hope for reconciliation.
Around our son Jon's first birthday Kevin asked if he could come visit and take Jon out for a little bit. I was hesitant but I think my mom thumped me on the head and said LET HIM DO THIS!!!
So Kevin, who had not had much contact with Jon at all, comes into my living room and Jon looks up

at him and immediately says, "DADA"
My heart was broken. It was like God just melted all of that anger away.
3 months later we were married!

FAST FORWARD a few years to today:
I sit back and watch Kevin play with Cole our very first Grandson, Jon's son, and I see how God has restored the years that Anger took.
I am so grateful and thankful my heart can almost not contain it all sometimes. The way Cole's eyes light up when Papa comes home is precious. I can't imagine anything better than being Coles Nana and Papa. We have been able to do this first year of Cole's life, TOGETHER.
Redemption is a real thing. I see it in the eyes of my little Cole.
The power of God's great love for us is just amazing.

Perspective is everything!!

This morning I woke to a text message from my daughter who is in Haiti. First she says,"hi mom love you!" 

Then proceeds to send me a picture

 I respond with, "wow thats a big one! "

She responds with this picture:

Along with "bahahahahaha mom its tiny!! The smallest one I have ever seen! "

Made me get all reflective and think how true this picture really is in life. 

Sometimes we think things are so much bigger than they really are. But when placed in the masters hand it seems so small! 

Just a little reminder for us all today! 

I found Forgiveness

Forgiveness is something I have never really struggled with until recently.
I never intended for unforgiveness to be something I struggled with but here I was finding myself in a place that  I could not get past.

It was not because of some huge injustice that was done to me either. It was just a simple problem that I made to big of a deal about.
I just could not move past the problem.
Then this summer I was reading 2 Corinthians 2 and this verse just  beat me over the head!
2:10 It says, now whom you forgive anything, I also forgive. For if indeed I have forgiven anything, I have forgiven that one for your sakes in the presence of Christ.

WOW.
God forgives us and when we forgive he also forgives them!!!
Why was I holding this unforgiveness?
Why?
It hurt so much and yet my pride wanted to hang on to the unforgiveness because it was easier than letting it go.

 I noticed it was not easy to give forgiveness because I had involved other people, in my unforgiveness.

I believe the simple truth is,  the biggest reason that people can't and won't forgive is because they let things go on in their mind far too long. They relive the offense over and over and then in telling others about the offense,  it solidifies their reasoning for not forgiving.
Forgiveness is not optional. God doesn't let you live with unforgiveness because he knows you are justified in your unforgiveness. THAT IS A LIE!

Gathering other in on your offense is not forgiving. Gathering others to help seek restitution is what we are supposed to do if we are to gather people at all.

The more people are involved in your unforgiveness the less likely you will be able to forgive.

So I had to ask the people that I involved in my unforgiveness to forgive me for involving them. It was not their burden to carry to begin with. It was sin for me to involve them.

Having asked for their forgiveness, made it easier for me to let it go!

What an amazing feeling to really let something go.
He removed it far from me and I don't want it back.

I finally found forgiveness. I received it and gave it. I am healed!
We truly serve and amazing God.

Thankfulness - Day 3

Today I am thankful for men and women that sacrifice so much for my freedom. Something I can never repay. I am thankful today that my precious friends son who just graduated from boot camp is now home for some very deserved R & R!

We are all so very thankful for you Blake. 

CONGRATULATIONS!! 

Thankfulness - Day 2

I am thankful for a God who loves us so much that through natures beauty He is impossible to deny!